DA: “Since
I’ve walked in, and in actual fact whilst I was
standing outside I was so pleased I became aware okay
of three energies, three spirit people, three spirit
energies. Two of them are ladies and one of a gentleman.”
Actually
he was just chatting away to Daniella and having a coffee.
“Now
what I want to say, [thank you Sam just give me that link].
Erm, what I want to say is one of the lovely ladies, I’m
very aware, would have passed over. I know there was a
blood condition. I know she was hospitalised. When I say
that I say that humbly, that’s what I’m being
shown and told. Some kind of blood condition that caused
her to erm er be laying in hospital conditions.
“I
feel that she was, administered um, some kind of drugs
to combat what I feel was a cancer condition with her.”
Okay
let’s translate that from Acorah-speak. Derek is
saying an unnamed woman died of cancer in a hospital.
I therefore assume the “blood condition” was
leukaemia. We don’t know when this happened, how
old she was or what her name was (is). In fact we know
sod all that would help identify her.
Debbie: (indistinct)
“That’s
for certain. And with this lady I feel there was also,
if you don’t mind me saying, just describing.
I feel body weight loss with her greatly. And I know
family members were around her and you know it’s
like she said towards the end she was in and out of herself.
In other words she wasn’t conscious all the time.
And it was, she
could hear you round her, she could hear a… what
was spoken. She could hear you talking.”
Okay
let’s pause for some reflection. This ‘lost
body weight’ before she died: among numerous possible
symptoms of leukaemia weight loss is indeed one. Derek
does make one specific comment that helps us narrow things
down a little. He says, “She could hear you talking.” Thus
we can assume Debbie at least visited the woman during
her time in “hospital conditions”. As to
the comments about hearing, as we are not informed what
was actually said, this provides us with no further useful
information.
“And
I know she was aware of two family members either side
of this bed leaning over talking to her. She, she, remembered
this feeling of her hair being, er, tidied and doing
this (Derek strokes his own face) around her face. She remembers
all this and she is thanking you.”
Back
to top
Note: “….thanking you.”
“She
wants you to know she could hear what you were saying
er she’s fine, she’s come from the world of spirit,
she’s in a lovely place.”
Once
again the reference is clearly aimed at Debbie.
“Oh
um, this lady’s talking about, [thank you Sam]
now whether that’s her name… no she’s
talking about another lady called Mary. Who was Mary?”
So
this lady who doesn’t seem to want to tell us her
own name, which would certainly help Debbie identify
her, manages to trot out someone else’s. Derek
asks (presumably because he doesn’t actually have
a clue) “Who was Mary?” which
would imply Mary has passed on. Debbie now enlightens us.
Debbie: “Do
you know my friend that’s here tonight has just
lost her mother and her sister is Mary.”
So
Debbie manages to make things fit, but this doesn’t
quite ring true. For a start Derek said it referred to
Debbie, not her friend. Did her friend’s mother
die of a blood condition etc? We’ll never know. ‘Mary’ was
referred to in the passed tense but the ‘Mary’ Debbie
talks about is still alive. Of course Derek now has a
bigger problem, he can’t risk giving a reading
on TV to someone who has only recently lost their mother.
Definitely not, “for entertainment purposes only”.
So rather than verify any of the generalised drivel he’s
been spouting he has to quickly lose the anonymous woman
and move on.
DA: “Well
can I just say this is what she’s giving me, also
the man, okay he’s coming forward here now. And
this man I’ll describe to you.”
No
don’t describe him Derek just tell us who he is
and what relationship he has to Debbie.
“Would
have stood in height about five foot ten, around
that height. A man please that wasn’t what we call…he
was bonnie, he had a bit of meat on his bones. And you
know he’s quite a strong looking man. Most (Derek
clutches his own face) I really impressed with
this. If you looked at him, he’s looking at you
erm, the colouration to his cheeks here were not red
but there was always colour there and he had a very,
very, very strong smile.”
You
just can’t help admire the way Derek whittles down
the number of people this could be to just a few million.
“But
I feel there was a weakness in his eyes when I say he probably
wore glasses that were quite strong. And he was, I feel
he wants me to say, he, although he had to wear the glasses
he was absolutely fed up with them. Didn’t like
wearing them. On and off, on and off ”
At
this point, possibly realising that he was spouting nonsense,
he started to become animated and theatrical presumably
in the hope that this will make up for the lack of relevance.
“…and
he liked nothing better to sit in a chair and read his
paper and not be bothered by anyone. In other words you
know he used to, I feel, maybe his wife used to shout
at him say, ‘Come on will you, get dressed properly’ and
you know and he’s just laid back, ‘Oh I’ll
do it, I’ll do it, I’ll do it”.
Back
to top
Complete
poppycock. This is simply a made up story that could
apply to just about any family in the UK and
beyond. He can reconstruct actual pieces of conversation,
tell us the strength of his eyes and yet still not come
up with a name or explain what the relationship is to
Debbie. Why this isn’t entirely transparent to Acorah’s
devoted masses I have no idea.
“Um
I also um, oh this other spirit lady, I’ll get
his name I hope very shortly. This other spirit lady
erm, would have passed to the world of spirit with something
to do with like a haemorrhage?
(phrased as a question), a haemorrhage. Now I, a haem....,
It could be a dual haemorrhage. Something here (touches
his temples) and also haemorrhage elsewhere towards
the end. And I feel very, very, very, strong with her
as well but I get, she walks around, she walks around
(Acorah looks like he’s thinking). She actually
walks around this home. She comes in visitation, er.
Can you remember also Lilly?”
Two
questions, one about the cause of death and one about
a name. All Acorah has told us is that he is speaking to
a dead woman, no age, no description (not even a general
one). Unless he is a complete idiot he knows full well
that a haemorrhage in
the brain would be referred to as a stroke. What about
the other haemorrhage? And what does he mean by, “Can
you remember also Lilly?” It is entirely bloody
obvious to me that he’s just throwing out a random
name in the hope it may fit somewhere. If she turned
around now and said her dead grandmother was called Lilly
devoted fans would hail this as further convincing proof
that he was communicating with the dead. He isn’t,
and this is a sham, or, if you prefer Livingtv’s
definition ‘entertainment’.
Debbie
responds: “No”
DA: “Okay
if it’s not Lilly it’ll be Lillian. Wasn’t
she linked to one of your aunts?
Debbie: “No.”
DA: “Lillian.”
Debbie: “I
can’t think of anybody to be honest.”
Back
to top
Any
particular aunt? So when Derek says “it’ll
be Lillian” he is in fact just plain wrong. If
poor Debbie digs deep into her family history and discovers
that her Grandmother’s best friend at school had
grown lilies in her back garden that would probably do
for Derek.
And
to all those who write to me telling me that Derek is
a gifted medium please make a note. You see you just have
to chuck out a name and let the mark rack their brains
to make a connection. That’s all you need to know
to understand what is really happening here. Is Derek
more right than would expected by chance? Of course not.
If he really did have some connection with the dead he
would a) be right more often and b) be able to give more
information – more meaningful information.
But hey if you are determined to go on believing don’t
let me stop you.
DA: “That’s
okay. That’s alright, it’ll probably come
back to you in a minute”
It
didn’t and was just forgotten.
DA: “But
I also want to say to you erm that John is
also coming in. John?
No okay John might
be Jack.”
Stating
the obvious for a moment ‘John’ is just about
as general a name as you can get but when it doesn’t
actually mean anything to Debbie he takes a second shot
by throwing in ‘Jack’ as well. What exactly
does he mean by “coming in”? I sort of assume
that he means John/Jack managed to get Sam’s attention
on the ‘other side’ but if Debbie says something
like her brother (who we’ll say is alive) is called
Jack, Acorah can respond by saying something like, “They’re
telling me about Jack…blah, blah, blah.”.
Debbie: “Right.” (but
doesn’t sound too sure)
DA: “Jack.
Okay. And he’s coming in. They give me the impression
there’s a child within the family that they are
aware, that, this child…. [okay]… this
child is um. Normally talk about schooling. Erm you I
feel they are trying to direct it at you. You’ve
done a good job over trying to help the child erm, not
overcome overcome obstacles but to help the child do
better.”
What
happened to Jack who was “coming in”? Later
when the actual reading is finished Debbie says she tought
Jack referred to her Grandfather - but
he's still alive! Next to Acorah
is what appears to be the picture of a young girl. I
wonder if he has noticed it? He starts talking about
an unidentified ‘child’,
options are left open as to the actual relationship by
simply saying she is “within the family”.
Helping a child “do
better” is not exactly laser like precision either.
Back
to top
Debbie: “Right.”
DA: “Now
they tell me you should understand this. Erm it’s
like as if, not learning difficult…. But it’s
something. How can I put it?”
What
does he mean “How can I put it?” I thought
he was the medium not the editor.
Daniella: “They’re
finding it hard at school.”
Daniella
digs him out of an awkward hole. Having started this
line of conversation he didn’t quite know where to
go with it without being potentially insulting the child
in question. If Debbie had a son or daughter who had severe
learning difficulties there may have been embarrassment
all round. In fact after the reading Debbie says she
sometimes has trouble getting her little girl off to school.
I guess as Jack is still alive he might well know that
anyway.
DA: “Yes.
Okay”
Debbie: “Yeah”
DA: “And
there’s the side of nature of the child okay, that
you had to like calm down. Make this child focus and you
loved… this
will probably be a girl child okay?"
Debbie: Nods
DA: “Not
a male. And like a daughter love, and it’s like [yep,
yep] I’ve got a very protective Grandmother.”
The “girl
child” is mentioned which rather leaves the comment, “not
a male” somewhat redundant. He still errs on the
side of caution by saying, “daughter love”.
I think we can all safely assume that the girl is someone’s
daughter what we would like to know is her name?
Debbie: Laughs
At
this point Derek launches into theatrical mode again.
DA: “She
comes in here and it’s like she’s laying
the law down here with me as if to say, ‘Now listen
(finger
wagging for emphasis) this is the way she was
and this is the way she is now presently.’”
“It’s
like, ‘Everyone of you better listen to me’ and
she spoke with her hands (more finger wagging), ‘And
woe betide you if…’ even if it was a man
she’d
say this sort of attitude okay. But a very kindred heart.”
Sorry
what? I don’t have a clue what he’s on about.
This silly over-acted impersonation is meaningless. I
have found though that this is an essential part of Acorah’s
technique. It’s what makes him different from others
in the field. That and his even dafter ‘possessions’.
He also has his own way of butchering the English language
so that despite using a lot of words he doesn’t
really say very much at all. What is he talking about ‘kindred
heart’? Was her heart related to Debbie in some way?
“Now
I feel with her she’s saying these words, her legs
now she can kick them high like a Tiller girl. Because
I know there was an effect with her legs okay. Erm and
also her back. For some reason, her back comes in there.
But she’s fit and well now, in her spirit body.
But she’s come to you in your sleep. You got a
noise I’m being told, and I hope you don’t
mind me saying this (hands
briefly strike a grovelling pleading pose) you
got a noise so, so many times because what she’s
tried to do is come to you in the sleep, come into this
home on a re…gu…lar basis. Did you? Forgive
me. Did you have a dog in this home that had to be put
to sleep?”
The
anonymous woman has better legs now. That’s nice.
Her “back comes in” as well, presumably following
her legs. Good of her to drop by and tell us. Acorah
likes to portray this Never-NeverLand quality
of the afterlife. This doggy, does it have a name? Maybe
a breed? Small? Big? Alas it’s just a general sort
of dog.
Debbie: “No
but…”
DA: “You
understand the dog being put to sleep?”
Debbie: “I
do.”
DA: “Well
he’s with them over there. Running the legs off
them, okay? They’re fed up, they haven’t
got the energy the dog’s got now, okay?”
Back
to top
We
can infer then that animals also have an afterlife. I
wonder if you can still train dogs to do tricks when they
are dead? Given all eternity there should be some very
clever spirit pooches around by now. What about lions and
tigers and bears oh my? The place must be heaving with
every known species. Are there dinosaurs? My daughter’s
gerbil died recently, I wonder if he has a little spirit
cage?
DA: “[What?
Yeah] And there’s also um, don’t take this
the wrong way but they make me aware okay that when they
come in visitation one time they made something go wrong
with the WC or the toilet? Do you understand this?”
Debbie: “I’m
not sure to be honest….”
DA: “What
was going on…? I don’t want this to sound
like, but something to do with the toilet.”
Just
when you thought Derek Acorah couldn’t say anything
more ridiculous he manages to excel himself. I’m
sure Debbie finds it very reassuring to be told that
ghosts are visiting her home and having a look in the
toilet while they’re there. Something to think
about next time she uses it.
Debbie: “Right.”
DA: “In
the toilet. Something that was going on… Was there
unusual water flow, something to do with the water with
the toilet?”
Prat!
Debbie: “Yes,
yes.”
DA: “Well
they’re awful sorry about it, because they made
it happen when they come in visitation. Okay”
Debbie: Giggling.
Not
only do they watch you in the loo but they mess about
with the “water flow”. I think Debbie is within
her rights to a) tell these unknown wraiths to stop spying
on her and b) leave her toilet damn well alone.
DA: “And
also… I got to.. sorry for pointing, I just get
energised with it.”
Indeed
Derek gets all worked up again.
Daniella: “He’s
so excited…”
DA: “Walking
up the stairs, going up the stairs going bom, bom, bom.
Who heard the footsteps?”
Debbie: slight
laugh, “Oh me actually. I often think I’ve
heard things.”
DA: “You
thought it was your imagination.”
Debbie: “Yeah.
I think I heard things.”
As
far as I can tell Debbie lives in a semi-detached home
and so the chances of hearing someone going up stairs
in the house next door are quite high.
DA: “It’s
not your imagination. Honestly. It’s not. It really
isn’t. Ann wants to be remembered. Ann’s
coming in (more theatrics), ‘You say my name! I’m
Ann. It’s great to be back! It’s great to
be back! I can breathe now properly’, she’s
shouting. She can breathe properly, so that must mean
a great deal to her. [What? Yeah. Who? Yeah]
They’re talking about
Paul. Who is Paul? Young Paul. Living. Physical.”
Ann
can breathe now? So we still have to breathe in the afterlife.
Why? What happens when you hold your breath for 15 minutes?
And after Ann’s brief appearance the name Paul
is thrown out. But despite the terrific description (young,
physical and living) Debbie can’t place him. No ‘John’ and
now no ‘Paul’.
Debbie: “No…”
DA: “They’re
not fussy on the name Paul.”
???
Debbie: “Oh
right.”
DA: “Check
that out.”
Debbie: “I
will do.”
DA: “There’s
someone…”
Debbie: I’m
sure there’ll
be people ring me telling me things ”
DA: “Watch
for this okay. It looks as though they're saying Paul
is going about it the wrong way. Paul
is going about it the wrong way.I’ve been
told by one of the lovely ladies here that your fridge
is going on the blink.”
Back
to top
I’m
gutted. I didn’t realise the message was so serious.
Paul’s going about it the wrong way. Oh no! Is
he trying to carry out a do-it-yourself heart transplant
or do they mean the way he changes the tyre on his bicycle?
Who knows?
Then
Derek drops another bombshell – the fridge is on
the blink! Oh yeah and how does the lovely lady know?
She probably caused it, she’s got form after all.
I haven’t
forgotten about the vandalism of the toilet.
Debbie: “That’s
more than likely true.”
DA: “They’re
saying (“They’re
saying”. It was just the lovely lady a minute ago) ‘check
the fridge, it’s gonna go on ya girl’. That’s
what they’re saying okay. [What? Yeah I will. Yes.
They exercise what? I don't want to embarrass] Erm okay.
I’ve
got to tell you this, that they’re saying it to
me very clearly, I’ve got to say to you. The
exercise contrption or machine (cough) that you got,
or want, they’re saying (cough) don’t
just look at it or think about it, go and do it will
you. Don’t
be putting it off. Sorry.”
I’m
desperate to know what this contraption actually is that
they are ‘clearly’ talking to Derek about.
Once again we find they are checking up on Debbie and
telling her how she should live her life. If I discovered
that my relatives had come into my house just to have
a nose around I would not be best pleased. The fact that
they are dead, somehow doesn’t made it more acceptable.
Notice Derek equivocation, “The exercise contraption
or machine that you got, or want…”
Debbie: It's
very right. I’ve got one in my bedroom.
I never use it.
DA: “Well
use it because they’re fed up with coming in and
seeing it lying dormant there, and you’ll get the
results.”
Everyone
is chuckling merrily at those wacky spirits but suddenly
Derek switches to his serious voice.
DA: “[What?
Okay, thank you] I’m also getting a man who, he’s
not loud, he’s not shouting but he’s just said, ‘please
I want to be remembered’. I’ll call him William,
his true name’s Bill.”
Debbie: ?
DA: “He
was an uncle of yours. Think back.”
Debbie: “Well
I don’t know. The whole of my father’s family
I’ve never met. So it could be anyone from that side.”
Doesn’t
look like poor old Bill will be remembered after all. He
can join the list of unknowns along with John, Jack & Paul.
Different names and the one thing they have in common is
that Debbie has never heard of them. How unlucky can a
medium be?
DA: “Okay
well he’s just said ‘uncle’…Check
on that side. [Er alright. Thank you] And there’s
also going
back a lovely babe child that was carried and was
lost to the world of spirit. The child would now be [How
old? Thank you, I can hear you] um the child now would
be probably around the 9, 10th, 11th year.”
I’ve
lost count of how many times I’ve heard mediums trot
this out. Potentially this has the power to move a woman
to tears. It is probably one of the most insensitive things
a person could say and a appears to be no more than a callous
attempt at the manipulation of a potentially vulnerable
person. Thankfully Acorah is as inaccurate here as has
been with the rest of the reading. Despite confirming he
can hear he can't give the exact age. If the child is growing
up in 'the spirit world' what happens when it reaches puberty?
Do spiritual hormones kick in?
At
this point Daniella says they are done but while they are
all packing up Derek still prattles on about the “babe” child.
After the reading,
but before the studio interview, Derek asks Debbie if she understood
everything. Debbie's reply: "A lot of it
I did understand. Some of it didn't ring true..." Damned by faint praise.
Finally
we get the summing up in which Debbie is prompted to say
what a wonderful experience it’s all been.
Unbelievably
the woman in the studio begins by saying to Debbie,
“Now
that looked like you recognised quite a few things in Derek’s
reading. What were the sort of things you could relate to?”
Debbie
mentions her friend’s mother who died of cancer and
her sister being called Mary. Not surprisingly she has
forgotten that Acorah asked “who was Mary” and
talked about a blood condition and not just cancer.
In
a further attempt to make Derek sound vaguely credible
she is asked,
“How
did it make you feel when he got it so right?”
Daniella
asks who Ann was and Debbie says it was her cousin who
died 10 years ago. She is not asked about Ann’s ‘breathing
difficulties’ or whether Derek’s theatrics
were a fair representation of her cousin.
The
summing up
Well
let’s see just how accurate Derek (and Sam) were;
We
started off with 3 spirit energies, 2 ladies and 1 man.
One lady was thought to be Debbie’s friend’s
Mum but the only reason to draw this conclusion is that
she died of cancer. She had no real connection with Debbie,
who was after all, the person having the reading. The name ‘Mary’ happens
to be her friend’s sister but all Derek did was throw
out the name and let Debbie come up with the connection.
Next
the man “comes forward”. This was the 5 foot
10 inch man with glasses and a strong smile. Despite this
generality it apparently meant nothing to Debbie.
Then
we have the other lady with the “dual haemorrhage” who
comes in “visitation” chiming in. Doesn’t
register at all.
Lilly
or Lillian is suggested and rejected.
‘John’ misses
but there seems to be a vague acceptance of ‘Jack’.
When Jack “comes in” all he does is mention
the child who doesn’t have learning difficulties
and is a girl - not a male. The picture of a girl is right
next to Derek but he never commits himself to the actual
relationship with Debbie.
Following
on from the girl child story we are introduced to the protective
Grandmother. Despite the finger wagging, Derek’s
meaningless characterisation and the new legs she apparently
meant nothing to Debbie.
After
finding out that she visits Debbie in her sleep a dog is
mentioned. Again no reaction from Debbie but she at least
knows of a dog that was put to sleep. The point of this
questioning by Derek is to give her the exciting news that
the dog is running around in the afterlife.
Then
we have the phantoms who spy on Debbie, make noises on
the stairs and muck about with her toilet, soon followed
by Paul who means nothing but we discover that her fridge
is due to go on the blink.
After
learning that she doesn’t exercise enough highly
forgettable Uncle Bill drops by.
Finally
we have the “child” lost in pregnancy which
has no meaning or relevance.
So
tell us again Debbie again, “How
did it make you feel when he got it so right?”
Now there are two
sites you must visit to understand the truth depth of this
farce.
First read Randi's
Commentary here.
Then spend time looking
at the amazing video clips and commentary here |